Mama's Weekly W(h)ine

Mama’s Weekly W(h)ine: All The News That’s Not Fit To Print

Mama's suggested w(h)ine pairing: a lovely (inexpensive) 2013 Starmont Sauvignon Blanc, Napa Valley

Mama’s suggested w(h)ine pairing: a lovely (inexpensive) 2013 Starmont Sauvignon Blanc, Napa Valley

Co-Founder’s note: As you dearest of the dear Filthy Dreams readers know, I (as well as our intrepid contributor Osman) are currently working away on Party Out Of Bounds: Nightlife As Activism Since 1980which is only a little over a month away *breathes into a paper bag/huffs poppers* Unsurprisingly because of this, we have been a little behind in the current events. It’s hard to obsessively check the latest news when you are concerned with framing nude photographs of Ethyl Eichelberger and worrying that Midwestern printer you’re working with may pour holy water all over your exhibition catalogs. But excuses, excuses…Taken by the unhinged ramblings of my mother’s Facebook page and her fearlessness in sharing them, I asked Mama to come back on board to Filthy Dreams and fill us in on what happened this week. 

Hey, honeys! During our daily am iPhone coffeeklatch, your co-founder Emily suggested that Mama have a weekly news segment on Filthy Dreams. She was inspired by my Facebook newsflash that President Warren G. Harding–having an abbreviated presidential term circa 1921-1923 when he prematurely croaked–apparently had enough time for extracurriculars. I’ll fill you in with the details later…

Anyway…here goes: A few observations by Mama on the past week or the week that was or recent yesterdays. Your editor again stated, “Don’t make me regret this!”

Warren "G-string" Harding (via wikipedia.org)

Warren “G-string” Harding (via wikipedia.org)

1. Warren G. Harding’s Love Child

Ah, Facebook…What would we do with out your “trending” source of pertinent information?! Well, today I learned from the New York Times that, because of modern technology/DNA testing, that ol’ Warren G. may have had a love child! Who knew? And, who-the-hell cares? A lot transpired during his short administration, like the Teapot Dome Scandal, blah, blah, blah. But, now it has come to light that Warren was a very busy boy. According to the infallible Wikipedia, he had several extramarital affairs, at least two.  *ahem*, The alleged mother, Nan Britton claims that they had sex in a White House coat closet with Secret Service posted outside! (Those guys should ask for combat pay). Anyhoo, DNA testing done by Ancestry.com (that’s where I would have my DNA tested) concludes that Harding was the father of Britton’s child. And, there you have it.

Mama would like all future presidents to behave themselves. Like President Obama, marry a classy lady/man, remain true and in-love.

becool_0-rhony-countess

2. The finale of the Real Housewives of New York

Co-Founder’s note: We would like acknowledge that none of the editors or other contributors at Filthy Dreams watch Real Housewives and have really no clue what “Mama” is talking about….Proceed with caution:

True confession: Real Housewives of New York has been Mama’s “turn-off-the-phones, go-away” guilty pleasure, at least this past season. What season is it anyway? I’ve missed a couple. I decided to see what Bethenny Frankel is up to on RHONY. With her recent divorce from Jason Hoppy, she’s not really a housewife. But then, none of these filthy-rich ladies are! (Having your entire courtship/pregnancy/wedding/delivery and child-rearing televised…I wonder why the marriage didn’t last? Huh. Me: “Hey! Get that GD camera outta my face!”) Well, this season was raucous. Watch it for yourself. On an ever-so-slightly serious note, I did enjoy Carol Radziwill, a learned mentally-stable member of the cast. She’s a writer. Mama could be friends with her.

Spoiler alert! Here’s a summary of the finale.

The Mutilated (image via newohiotheatre.org)

The Mutilated (image via newohiotheatre.org)

3. Tennessee Williams’ “The Mutilated” is going to New Orleans!

A few Thanksgivings ago, Mama and her family (her honey, Daddy and your co-founder Emily), had the good fortune to see TW’s comedy “The Mutilated” at the New Ohio Theater in NYC with Mink Stole and Penny Arcade. What a treat! I couldn’t put it better myself than a review by AndrewAndrewTubeTube. I have no idea who these guys are but have a look:

Well, The Mutilated, with Mink Stole, is heading to NOLA, performing at the Contemporary Arts Center, 11/19-11/21! Oooo, baby. Pre-game with a sazerac or two or three and go see it!

The George & Dragon (via pinknews.co.uk)

The George & Dragon (via pinknews.co.uk)

4. Death by gentrification: For sale, The George & Dragon Pub

Same old story…This time it’s The George & Dragon in London, home of the White Cubicle Toilet Gallery and up-coming Party Out of Bounds satellite exhibit by John Walter. High rent is forcing another ensconced establishment to “turn in its dinner pail”, as it were. What we need is another crystal palace that only the extremely well-to-do can afford.

Mystery gets Trumped

Mystery gets Trumped

5. Trump…need I say more?

What century is this? I thought the 70s “You’ve come a long way baby”, Roe vs Wade, Ms magazine, bra-burning made us chicks equal. I guess as long as neanderthals are still roaming the earth we ladies need to pound sense into ’em. Geez. And then there’s Trump. I’d like to thump Trump. We ALL know what he meant in reference to the debate moderator Megyn Kelly.

Here’s some free advice from Mama for all the prez’ candidates. Don’t mention any bodily fluids…ever.

Well honeys, ‘time to go. Until next week, Mama’s gonna pour herself another glass of w(h)ine!

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